Tears on the Pure White Snow
by blueglassmoon
Summary: A story of a young man trying to understand the meaning of "heartbroken" with the cold snowy night. From Vocaloid's Kagamine Len's song, Fure Fure Koyuki. A one-shot story.


A/N: I love Len so much and I love his songs so muuuch / so here I am, a silly me made a story based on one of his sad but beautiful songs~ ToT Vocaloid's Kagamine Len's song, Fure Fure Koyuki… I do not own the character or the song…

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"Thank you, Len-kun... You loved me honestly, truthfully... Without a doubt, I'm the luckiest person on this earth because you loved me. But... I'm very sorry, Len-kun. It's not like I really didn't love you back. I think you're not- I mean; I'm not the girl for you. You're too nice for me and you know it already, right? We did understand each other, talk a lot to each other... We thought that we are made for each other because of you know... mutual understanding. However, I guess not... I still feel empty with you... I don't want to say this but... I already found someone that I will truly love... You will find one too. I know you will..."

She placed her hands on my shoulder, looking at me directly with those lovely eyes that I loved so much. The warmth of her soft hands which are now wearing pink knitted gloves, can I afford to hold it again?

"So this is the end?" I muttered softly under my breath, looking at her while trying my best to maintain my calm posture.

She averted her gaze, removed her gloved hands, and went to stare at the river.

"It started to fall..."

"Huh? Fall?" I looked at her with confusion. What does she mean by fall? Is it obvious that I'm starting to fall apart because of this sudden circumstance of hers?

"You're so silly sometimes. For your information, tonight the snow will start to fall. Look," she looks up to the sky as if searching for something to fall. She smiled and run a few meters away from me. She jumped, trying to catch something. She walked slowly to me and showed me a white glittering powder. "See? It's snowing already."

It's so cold yet I feel so warm around her. Her smile makes my heart jump with joy. For me, she's the sun that gives sunlight to my life. But... tonight will be the last time that she will shed light to me. I feel my eyes starting to heat up... Why? What did I do to suffer like this? Am I not enough for her? Am I such a bother? I closed my eyes, wishing that this feeling will last soon, wishing for her not to see the weak me.

"Len-kun? Len-kun?"

That voice... I'm going to miss hearing that melodic voice. I don't want to let her go... I love her so much. But if I really love her, I have to release her if that what she wanted. I can't... do that...

"I can't," I whispered. A sudden awkward silence held between us. Oh God, I feel so weak! Why not let her go already?

"..." She just stared at me with those gloomy eyes and started to speak up with her last words, "I'm very sorry, Len-kun. Good bye."

She walked up to me and placed her hands on my cheeks. I felt her soft lips on mine and she went away. I just stared at her back as she walks away. As her image is slowly fading, I tried to held back something warm flowing on my cheeks. I want to voice something out. I want to say _"Don't go"_. But I cannot... It hurts a lot. Now, I cannot see her image clearly as the snow falls. She's gone... clearly gone... My body is now trembling not because of this cold winter because of my heart is starting to break apart. I feel so empty now... The sun that gives light to my heart is now gone and says good bye. I look at the gloomy sky... Does that sky pity me?

_Reminiscing about the past, I remembered a night where the moon illuminates us just like tonight... cold, snowy. With white breath and our fingers numb from cold, we trace our names together in the snow before it melts away. Do you still remember that, my beloved? I remember promising you one thing. Those words still in my heart, "I won't leave you". But now, it means no more because you left. Now, I trace our names but still I cannot continue tracing. I'm all alone now. No one is here to shelter me the warm feelings._

_I remember the days, the moments, we were together. Those happy memories, I will treasure them forever. I remember the moments you smiled a lot. Those smiles of yours. I love it dearly... The last trace of your smile remaining in my memory is so ephemeral. I wish those days with you would last forever which is now impossible to happen. So cold... so cold... I wish you go back and embrace me tightly._

_I wish for the snow to fall into you and hide you. Snow falls, piling up and swallows you and our past. Until the day it finally melts away, don't forget me._

Is it okay to cry? I ask no one in particular. My eyes feel so hot because of these hidden emotions I tried to keep inside. Now, they want to go out and release their feelings. Is it really okay to cry? Without anyone answering me, warm salty water trickles down my freezing cheeks as I stare at her footsteps on the snow. The steps which are directed away from me... Can I release all my feelings, right? I burst into tears... I released all the feelings that I locked inside myself. I don't want to be selfish to myself and I want the _"me"_ to realize how painful it is. How it is like to be broken by someone. It really hurts, I know it sounds so weak but what can I do to stop suffering? I want to cry and shout. I want to ask her, _"Why are you leaving me behind?"_. I fell into my knees and kept thinking why does it hurt so much. I kept asking myself so many questions. Why is the world looks blur? Why is my surrounding look hazy? What is this thing that continues to drop into the snow? What's with these warm cheeks? No. I already know the answers. All I want to ask to myself…"can I move on?"

_I wish for the snow to fall into me and hide me. A drop of my voice, of my tears fall. The snow that snow that falls piles up, swallowing the world and my love. Until the day the pain in my heart is gone, I'll melt into white and "don't forget me."_

I want to forget you and move on…

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A/N: waaaaaaaah! I just released it here.. So happy~ anyway, if you think you have seen this story somewhere than I bet you saw this on wattpad. I first released this there but I think it's better to release it here…. Then again~ :3 review please?


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